Nor the wives of college buddies, not old relatives who can't recall new names but remember spending a lot of money on a nice present the first time, and particularly not the original wife, who considers herself to be the bonafidewife. When a man marries for the second time, he understands what he's getting himself into. He may have made a commitment in his previous marriage that doesn't allow for another relationship, or maybe he just likes his freedom. No matter what the reason is, once the second husband finds out about the first one he's got to let her go.
The fact is that men are from Mars, women are from Venus. It's hard for two people from different backgrounds, with different values and expectations, to make a successful partnership. That's why most marriages end up being second marriages for both parties. If you are looking at a man who has been married before you should ask questions, get to know each other better, and only then decide if this is someone you want to share your life with.
The first wife is usually the one who gets thrown under the bus by the second husband. She's expected to understand his need for freedom and to respect his decision even if she disagrees with it. The first wife also needs to understand that no second husband is going to love her the way his first did. Love grows over time through shared experiences and conversations. When you marry for the second time you're trying to find a person who is right for you at this moment in time.
What is not normal is for him to be the second wife. You didn't grow up thinking to yourself, "I can't wait to meet a divorced man!" You've probably always imagined someone who has never been married. That doesn't mean it can't be fantastic. That doesn't mean it won't last.
A second marriage is not a sign of failure or infidelity on the part of the first husband. It is simply second nature for men to marry again when their wives die. If anything, it shows how much they love them. Second marriages are also common among women for various reasons including divorce, death of spouse, etc.
In Islam, a woman cannot be granted divorce unless she causes harm to her husband physically or sexually. So if he divorced her, he would have to provide her with an alternative accommodation and pay her alimony until she finds another husband. The prophet (peace be upon him) allowed divorce under certain circumstances such as marital difficulties or the need to care for children. He also suggested that divorce not be used as a tool by husbands to control their wives.
It is recommended that if a husband has reason to believe that his wife is being unfaithful, he should observe her movements during periods of time when he knows she will be alone and then plan his attack carefully. For example, he could place a hidden camera in her bedroom to capture her in the act.
Those who marry to meet particular wants but are unwilling to offer in return frequently marry again with the same motive the following time. The second marriage is reduced to a trip down a precipice, a flirtation that leads to a new calamity (fresh only because it involves a new partner). Another dubious trend is occasionally at work. Some women (especially in countries where polygamy is allowed) marry several men in their lifetime. These marriages are usually not respected by society and often lead to abuse, even death, of the women involved.
The main reason people get married again is that the first marriage ended in divorce. Often there are no ill feelings between the parties but simply nothing else will do. They may have been too young or too old for one another. Maybe one was a child when they got married so didn't know what they were getting into. Perhaps one or both wanted something else out of life and felt that marrying him/her would put an end to the search. However, despite these justifications, most people get married again because they want to be married or because they think everyone else should be married too.
After the first marriage ends in divorce, many people find themselves looking for someone to share their lives with. Sometimes this means looking outside of your own family, which can be difficult if you don't feel like you're giving up anything important by doing so.